Being Competitive is human nature that helps you assert yourself. We all have to deal with our competitors at some point. Whether it’s a neighbor who needs increasingly extravagant Christmas decorations, or a co-worker who takes credit for every project, competitive people can provoke irritation, fear, or inadequacy.
You may question yourself or feel your wealth, talents, and achievements are underappreciated. Or you unnecessarily invest extra time or money trying to compete with them. Why are some people so competitive?
Competitive advantage refers to factors that allow a company to produce goods or services better or more cheaply than its rivals. These factors allow the productive entity to generate more sales or superior margins compared to its market rivals. Competitive advantages are attributed to a variety of factors including cost structure, branding, the quality of product offerings, the distribution network, intellectual property, and customer service.https://www.investopedia.com/terms/c/competitive_advantage.asp
How to be Competitive: Fragile self-esteem
Research studies suggest that there are different types of children with self-esteem. Some people have a sense of security regardless of the situation, while others have an insecure or vulnerable sense of self, depending on their past performance and who they impress, feel superior to others, but when they are depressed, they feel shame and self-doubt. This leads to insecurity and attention to social status and achievement. We must constantly compare ourselves to others so that others do not fall behind.
How to be Competitive: Scarce Resource Model
Some people have a relationship model based on scarce resources. I mean, when I get something, I’m left with less. They have a survival mentality and can be jealous and controlling. Underlying it is often deep anxiety about meeting emotional needs. They may have had critical parents, played favorites, could not attend to their emotional needs, or were inattentive. This model suggests that humans are inherently social creatures and does not consider that we can increase our personal and environmental resources by connecting and collaborating with larger social groups. It classifies people and ignores common goals and experiences.
How to be Competitive: Narcissism and Sociopaths
Some competitors are pathologically narcissistic and self-centered, treating you not as a distinct person but rather as a reflection or extension of yourself, a source of admiration for their achievements, and a source of respect for their successes. We see it as a potential threat or an object. Use or operate to meet your own needs or increase your resources. They may resort to manipulation, deception, intimidation, and abuse to neutralize or eliminate threats and competition if they are also sociopathic. These saboteurs are the hardest to deal with, especially if they dominate you in your work environment or social group. These individuals tend to seek positions of power and control over others.
How to be Competitive: Competitive Environment
All work environments involve some degree of competition. Healthy competition, balanced by mutual respect and commitment to common goals, inspires people to do their best. However, when competition consistently involves nasty, mean, or otherwise reckless behavior, it can adversely affect the health and productivity of employees or group members. It has been suggested that those at the top of the hierarchy are healthier when their leadership positions are stable but worse when they are unstable. Constantly defending your position and territory against competitors can affect people’s minds and bodies.
The recession has reduced employment, created job instability, and increased competitive pressure. Nationwide, anxiety disorders and mental health problems are on the rise.
How to be Competitive: What You Can Do
Here are some tips for dealing with conflicting colleagues, friends, or family members. The best strategy depends on the situation (e.g., friends vs. work), the cost of not winning, and the person’s motives. There is no magic formula that works all the time. You should continue to monitor whether your strategy is working and, if not, try another strategy.
- At Work:
A competitive workplace that takes on extra work and responsibilities can be an asset to the entire team. Do your fair share and ensure you are responsible enough to show off your talents. When her team members go above and beyond, remember they have shared individual goals and celebrate their efforts. This may be what they are looking for to help them feel more comfortable and safe.
Sneaky competitors trying to sabotage or praise your work require a different approach. Keep yourself safe and use passwords to protect your information. Keep detailed records of your contributions and let your manager know what you’ve done.
You can also speak to the person directly to let them know you’re talking to them. If that’s not your style, let your boss know what’s going on and what steps you’ve already taken to address the problem.
This type of person can act kindly to extract information from you, so stay alert and keep contact with them to a minimum. Don’t be fooled into reacting. Always one step ahead. You can also let other colleagues know about the situation and ask for help.
- With Friends and Family:
People who compete for homes, children, dinner-her parties, etc., are insecure or arrogant and want to prove their superiority. If they’re the uncertain type, praising their achievements and staying calm and friendly will help them see you as an ally rather than a threat. and blow your own horn, or you might want to change the subject when you start bragging. Arrogant people tend to be narcissistic and status conscious. So if you’re confident and appear to have a high quality and track record, they’re more likely to respect you. If that’s not your style, walk away and find someone who isn’t selfish to talk to.
- In General:
Find out why this person is competitive and their needs and goals. Also, see if there are common goals that you can use to work with you instead of working against you. For example: “We both want what is best for our children…”. “To avoid duplication, let’s divide this work. What part would you like to take on?” This strategy is more effective when you can expect the person to do their part and not take all the credit.
Whatever strategy you choose, remember how the person triggers your harmful scripts and insecurities if competitiveness is just one aspect of her. , try to see the whole of people and relationships. Please don’t get too hung up on personalizing or trying to change their behavior. This may be about their inner insecurities, not yours. Think about the humanity you share with that person and try to feel compassion for you and them.
How to be Competitive: Life is a Competition
Of course, there seem to be infinite ways to measure yourself. And not all compete for the same result. But whatever you do, you are undoubtedly struggling for some development.
- Often with myself, and with others.
Sports were a big part of my childhood—basketball, football, baseball, then golf. I love making them. I loved the competition. With my brother. With other children in the neighborhood. With older children. With friends. With other teams. Through high school.
Through all these experiences, you begin to learn what makes you competitive. We also start looking at the psychology that drives people competitive in general.
How to be Competitive: Everyone is Different
- One of his pitfalls in team sports is feeling that someone on the team isn’t as motivated to win as he is. It’s incredibly frustrating.
But what’s likely to happen in these cases is that you’ve found something you want to win, while others are less motivated. You might be good at it. They may have come across careers, sports, and so on. But they don’t have the same motivations as you.
- They can be motivated and have something they are very good at. And maybe you’re not as motivated as they are.
This is also common among entrepreneurs and small business owners. Sometimes it’s hard to believe that your team cares less about the company’s success than you do. I hope no one cares more about their business than you. If you don’t watch the least about it, chances are bad business.
Understanding what is most important to them seems to make people competitive. Often called intrinsic motivation. You are motivated to do something as well as you can. Not because someone else asked you to do so. Not because someone is watching. Maybe not even because they are paid.
How to be Competitive: Other Motivations
Often we don’t even know what drives us to participate. Maybe it started before we started forming lasting memories. For example, at some point in my childhood, I was pretty good at throwing a basketball, and I’m pretty sure I wanted to feel good again.
I’ve read some rock star biographies. It’s an exciting story, but I think more than half of them started playing music because they wanted to be noticed by the opposite sex. They saw someone who was a musician, saw the reaction they got, and thought it was worth the effort and competition to do it themselves.
For some reason, people seem competitive when they discover something that drives them. Without that drive, you might come across something you’re good at. They can do it over and over again, like a job they’re good at. But if they can’t find the motivation, you probably won’t be among the competitive people you meet in life. Someone who seems driven to succeed at any cost.
You can see how competitive it is. You see someone doing extra work. in sports. At your job. With everything that matters to them. You can tell by their body language. You hate the feeling of losing. They love the feeling of winning. They celebrate their successes even when no one is looking.
It is widespread in the world of golf. Someone who deeply cares about being good at golf will put the long putt or hit a good shot and, without anyone seeing, put the club back in the pocket and deliver a small punch or a smile.
But there are competitive advantages. I often see people going too far. They hurt the people around them when things go wrong. They don’t know how to be polite about losing. Sometimes these feelings are excused with “someone who cares so much.” I don’t believe it.
On the other hand, there are people like pro golfer Fred Couples. He has a reputation as a very relaxed person. Get out there and hit the ball, and see what happens. This may seem uncompetitive. But those closest to Fred say that if he cared about the tournament, he would give it his all. If he does well, he celebrates inside. Beware the fringes of competition. Recognize that you are getting too close.
How to be Competitive: Cooperation
The final element of competition is the idea of cooperation. It’s easy to see that people are most often successful when they work together. Even the quarterback of a football team touches the ball less than 50% of the time. You have limited control, but then it depends on how well the rest of your team performs.
Good leaders seem to bring out the best in their teams. Find your source of motivation. They want to promote competition and cooperation at the same time. They build accountability into their programs which leads to competition and collaboration.
For example, a sales manager runs a primary sales contest. But they are building structures to ensure cooperation. You don’t want it to go awry when one person closes more deals at the expense of others on the team. Not suitable for the team as a whole and not good for the individual.
How to be Competitive: Final Thoughts
A competitive person is usually someone who has found something they care deeply about. They are good at finding reasons to care about what they do. They understand that they may not start well at something but find reasons to practice and improve. Non-competitive people usually don’t look for their motives. If you don’t like something, move on. When they aren’t happy and want more, they typically don’t understand what motivates them most sincerely.
Start by looking within if you’re having trouble finding your competitive edge. Find out what was important to you in the past. Find what you were doing when no one was looking. Think about what you want for your future.
Understanding yourself is the key to finding the motivation to build your competitive edge. If you are interested in increasing your knowledge in this field, you can read the “How to Manage an Exhausted Workforce” article.