13 signs that your husband is selfish

If you have the experience of living with a selfish husband, you must know how annoying it is. If your spouse only pays attention to himself or accepts invitations of others for parties without coordinating with you, unfortunately, we have to tell you that he is probably selfish. Here, we will learn the signs of a selfish husband and the correct way to deal with such a person.

Why do men become selfish?

This characteristic is passed on from the father or other family members to the children, or a person may conclude that he should put himself first. There are various reasons for rooting this feature in men, some of which we mention below.

• Childhood: Sometimes, the roots of selfishness can be found in childhood. For example, being an only child sometimes makes children avoid sharing any of their belongings with others. Similarly, people with siblings may constantly fight over things and dislike sharing their toys or books.
• Childbirth: When you have a baby, it is natural that your attention as a mother is focused on the newborn child. This can make your husband feel lonely. He constantly wants your attention and affection. Not getting enough attention can lead to highly selfish behavior in your partner.
• Work stress: When your husband is under extreme pressure at work, his expectations and requests from you will increase. When your spouse has financial problems and cannot pay the debts, he develops a kind of despair. This feeling makes him less considerate of others, making him selfish.
• Feeling superior to women: Some men have grown up in a culture where gender stereotypes have led them to conclude that they are superior to women. Such men always want the top position and constantly fight with others to get the best position. Simply put, such men cannot tolerate the superiority of their wives in the workplace or other situations. This causes them to feel narcissistic and selfish.

Characteristics of selfish people.

In the following, we discuss the signs of a selfish husband. If these signs are present in your husband, don’t worry. We discussed how to deal with such spouses properly at the end of the item.

He is always right.

If your partner thinks he is always right about everything and never wrong, know he is selfish. Your spouse may also not accept the opinions of others or have a very critical view of their opinions. These characteristics in your spouse show that he is narcissistic and selfish.

He is only interested in himself.

If your spouse is only interested in himself, then he is selfish. For example, when you converse with your husband, he may only talk about himself, his interests, and hobbies and not even allow you to talk.

If your partner ignores your feelings and interests, how you spend your day, or what you enjoy, we can conclude that he is selfish.

He takes control of everything.

If your husband is selfish, you must have noticed that he wants things to go his way. Such people make decisions about everything. In which restaurant to have dinner, with whom you hang out, etc., depends on their wishes.

Of course, having someone to take control of things is sometimes good because you don’t have to worry about it anymore. But if this feeling of mastery and control over everything becomes extreme, it can cause many problems in your life together.

He never apologizes.

One of the critical characteristics of a selfish husband is that he does not apologize even if he makes the biggest mistakes. This means that he is so involved and obsessed with himself that he ignores the fact that he makes you sad and annoyed with his mistakes. Your husband may love you, but if he doesn’t apologize when he causes a mistake, he is a selfish husband.

It is not communicating with you properly.

We all know that proper communication is the key to a successful relationship. If your spouse doesn’t communicate with you properly, doesn’t talk to you, and doesn’t talk to you, he is probably narcissistic and selfish.

He is rude.

Selfish people ignore what is happening around them and only see themselves as the center of everything. You will never hear sentences like “please” or “thank you” from such people. They are so self-absorbed that when others do something for them, they consider it their duty.

After a fight, he does not try to reconcile.

This feature is entirely regular in a selfish husband. If you always apologize and try to reconcile after a fight, and your partner does nothing about it, know that he is selfish. If this is the case, know that your husband does not value you and your relationship.

He is very critical.

Being selfish means ignoring the feelings of others or rejecting their opinions. A selfish husband constantly criticizes his wife for everything she does. If you feel that your spouse’s critical behaviors have become a habit and he doesn’t realize that these behaviors are bothering you, know that he is being selfish.

He doesn’t talk about you.

We must admit that we all like to be complimented by others, especially our spouse. If your partner never compliments you, know he is selfish because he doesn’t care how much it affects your self-esteem.

You cannot force others to praise you. However, if you wore a lovely dress to get your partner’s attention or tried hard to make him happy, but he didn’t show any emotion, we can conclude that he is selfish.

He ignores your advice.

Does your spouse always make important decisions without consulting you? If your answer is yes, know that your husband is selfish. In a joint life, everything should be done in consultation with each other so that the good of both parties is considered. A husband who makes decisions and has the final say without paying attention to his wife’s opinions, recommendations, and desires is a selfish person.

He doesn’t care about your interests.

The presence of this characteristic in a selfish husband is natural because he only cares about himself, and the only person he cares about is himself. A selfish husband ignores his wife’s interests, wishes, goals, and ambitions. He rarely listens to his wife’s words and is not a patient listener. This is while he expects you to listen to his every word patiently and carefully.

Instead of you, he prioritizes his work.

A selfish husband usually drowns himself in work. If you object that he works too much and doesn’t pay enough attention to the family, he will complain that you don’t appreciate his sacrifice and immense effort for the family’s well-being.

All the housework is your responsibility.

Housework such as cooking and cleaning is not the duty of women, and dividing these tasks is a natural part of living together. But if your spouse has dropped the ball in your court and isn’t cooperating, we’re sorry to say you’re living with a selfish husband.

Such people either sit in a corner like a boss and give orders, or they sit in a corner and do nothing at all. In any case, you are the one who has to do all the housework.

How to behave correctly with a selfish husband.

If all or some of the above signs are present in your husband, you should consider a basic solution. There are different ways to behave correctly and logically with a selfish spouse, which we will mention below.

Talk to him about it.

Although the probability of this issue is low, your spouse may not know he is behaving selfishly. Some of our behaviors gradually become bolder, so we are unaware of them. In such cases, when someone points out our wrong behavior, we only realize its existence in ourselves.

Do not argue with your husband about this. First, tell him you want to talk about something bothering you for a while. Ask him if he has time for this. Tell your spouse gently and appropriately that his selfish behavior has offended you.

Once your partner realizes he’s making you feel bad, he’ll gradually change his selfish behavior. Note that your spouse may be upset that you first brought this up with him, which is normal. No one likes to be criticized. Give him time to think so that he realizes his wrong behavior.

Be patient.

Just because you told your husband to change his selfish behavior doesn’t mean everything will change overnight. Changing behavior is a gradual process and requires patience. You should talk about this with each other several times. Remind your partner that changing this behavior benefits your partner and makes you have a better relationship.

Changing behavior is hard for all of us, so give your partner a break. In such cases, it is good to thank your spouse for the efforts he makes for you so that he realizes that you do not only pay attention to his negative aspects but also consider his positive qualities.

Pay attention to yourself.

If your spouse is narcissistic and selfish, he never thanks you for the favors you do for him and does not appreciate you, and you do not need to give him all your attention and energy. Take care of yourself and do things that make you feel good. Over time, your partner will realize that you are focusing on yourself instead of paying attention to him, and he will probably take action to get back to you.

Find the root of the problem.

Find out why your husband is selfish. If your spouse has recently become like this, find out where it originated. Your partner may feel bad about himself because of the job loss and act selfishly to feel important.

Sometimes selfish behavior may be rooted in the past and back to childhood issues and problems. The best way to determine the exact cause of this behavior is to talk to your partner. Just because your spouse had a difficult childhood or lost his job doesn’t mean he can mistreat you.

Talk to your spouse about this and how you feel. Tell him your relationship is significant, and you don’t want anything to come between you and him. Talk to each other and think of a correct solution.

Living with a selfish spouse is challenging and exhausting. But this does not mean that you should immediately think about divorce. Be patient and act as soon as possible to solve this problem.